Tuesday, December 7, 2010

So.... Dating....

So my head is in the dating scene. Unfortunately, I have the WORST luck with guys. Most notably, I have issues with internet dating especially when it comes to the almighty text. It's so bad, that my friends ask me to repeat already told stories, just so that they can laugh at me... again.

Who are my friends? Well, let me introduce you to a few you may know. If you don't know them, you probably should. They're some of the greatest people and writers I know.

The players, from Left to Right:
Carol Lynne (author of erotic male/male romances with nearly 100 in publication. Go Carol!)
Brynn Paulin (author of all kinds of goodness, mostly known for her BDSM stuff)
Bronwyn Green (ever cheerful tree-hugger who looks at the world with stars in her eyes)
Kris Norris (newly made friend, Canadian with a huge smile, huge laugh, and lots to say)
Me, Mia Watts.

And the following are things that only happen to me. Two examples.

1.











2.












There are so many ways my experiences are WRONG! just WRONG! If I put these in a book, my editor would tell me it wasn't realistic. But it IS! It ISSSS! This is just the twisted world I live in! The kind of stuff that only happens to me.

*head shake*

~Mia

*You can find MiaWatts on her blog, and at WritersEvolution blog every tuesday. Mia has 26 titles in publication, with the release of Knight's Fall later this month from Total-E-Bound(dot)com.*

24 comments:

Blodeuedd said...

Lol, I should not laugh, but it is funny. Men are weird

Mia Watts said...

OMG, laugh, laugh a lot. I do! How else can I possibly take all the weirdness that comes along if not with a sense of humor. :)

Plus, Carol was awesome about that first instance. She is always so composed and blase, but she whips out these quips that leave you rolling at the time.

Jambrea said...

ROFL! I know what you mean. I started emailing this guy and after one day he was all...I can't stop thinking about you. I'm like...I don't even KNOW you. lol

And I can so see Carol, Brynn and Bronwyn saying those things. heehee

Mia Watts said...

J3....sooooo glad it's not just me! :) I love hanging out with those women. You know, now that three of us are up in Grand Rapids, you aren't that far away. Day trip sometime?

Jessica said...

That was wonderful, thanks for the laugh! Though I really shouldn't laugh, it almost seems like deja vu, but without the texting. My dating days were over before the invention of texting! Wow, tell your age why don't cha!

Keep trying Mia, the perfect man is out there for you, somewhere...over the rainbow!!!

Carol Lynne said...

I have that man's penis imprinted in my nightmares. I knew there was a reason I have absolutely no interest in dating. At 45, I've seen both the growers and the showers and neither is enough to put up with them for the other 23 hours of the day.

Mia Watts said...

OMG, Carol, LOL!!!! I know and the lovely addition of that man's yellow-orange football team boxers. I think my thumb was bigger. Just saying.

Jessica, I'll never give up. Might take a break now and then, but I love men too much. Unfortunately, I have too many experiences with guys that fall into the category Carol mentioned.

Carol Lynne said...

Exactly! I mean, if you're going to take a picture of your stuff, at least fluff it up a bit first.

Mia Watts said...

I did wonder why he didn't at least shoot erect. I mean, he HAS to know it was unimpressive as was. Unless... oh, God, Carol... what if he isn't a grower either!?

Carol Lynne said...

Yep, perhaps that was his fluffed state. In which case, better that you didn't waste anymore texting charges on him.

Mia Watts said...

Free texting, but yeah, there's just no excuse to send that particular picture to anyone. I mean, I only told him where I lived! Apparently it warranted a cock. Who knew?

Jambrea said...

I'm think that a day trip does need to be planned Mia. Um...when it is warmer. lol

Bronwyn Green said...

Still. Hilarious.

Although, I have to admit, I'm more disturbed by the feet texts. You sure know how to attract them. ;)

Mia Watts said...

@Jambrea-warmer, warmer, I think it gets warmer here. I'll have to check with the local wildlife. ie/ Brynn and Bronwyn.

@Bronwyn-yes, I know. You have the weird magnet on your head, but I think it rubbed off or something.

Simone Anderson said...

Absolutely hilarious!

And Mia, it does get warmer. Around May. Most of the time. I'm just south of you. Unless you 90+ and humidity - you'll have to wait 'til August. :)

Julia Rachel Barrett said...

Your new career? Cartoonist? Illustrator of bad text dating? I think it's a hit!

Sweet Vernal Zephyr said...

HA! I so know the world you just TwilightZoned to. :D

I've got a guy that continues to send me emails about once a month (which I don't answer) begging me to "Please let me serve you maam."

Apparently "No" isn't a word he understands how to obey.

Thanks for making me laugh today! And BTW, you girls aren't far from my Grandparent's home (Holland)...

Molly Daniels said...

There are no words...everything I type comes out wrong!

Tracy said...

lolol OMG that was so disturbingly funny!

Kris Norris said...

Yes, that was quite the evening. I, too, can the odd nightmare with that particular image...oh, and I have to tell you...this particular experience has become a cautionary tale.

Just the other day, a gal pal of mine was down because she was on the outs of yet another bad relationship... thought only she attracted the weirdos... so I told her this exact story to cheer her up. Yes, you two are a lot alike.

Thanks for the laugh...still funny three months later:)

Anna Mayle said...

Hahaha, you lead a charmed life Mia! ^_^

Chris said...

Hmm. And I thought that my internet dating stories were bad. You win. :)

Mia Watts said...

OMG so something I don't want to win! Plus, Kris, I don't feel better at ALL that I am a tale of woe for your friend.

Anna, charmed isn't exactly the Webster definition. ;) But I'll take it.

SVZ, Molly, Tracy- sigh. Yeah. Story of my life.

Hot gossip said...

This is so funny. I have truly enjoyed it.

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