Irregular Chat with Irregular Authors

Hi there, Nicole Kimberling here with day two of the Blind Eye Books 2011 Round Up and Jamboree.

Today Astrid Amara and Josh Lanyon join Ginn and I to talk about writing our shared world anthology, Irregulars.

Nicole: For those of you unfamiliar with shared worlds, basically all the authors write their own stories but in the same setting, and allowing their characters to cross over. So all the authors have separate novellas – and obviously each of us bring a different tone and point of view – but the agency for which the characters work remains the same.

My story, Cherries Worth Getting, follows Agent Keith Curry, a former chef assigned to investigate cases of questionable culinary practices of extra-humans, who all-too-often put people on the menu. It also stars Gunther Heartman, another Irregular agent who I straight-up stole from Ginn Hale. And that’s the beauty of shared worlds. You read a side character in another author’s story and say, “I love that guy. I think I’m going to swipe him.”

Josh: My story is called Green Glass Beads. I got the idea from a poem called “Overheard on a Salmarsh” by Harold Monro, which I first read as a little kid. It’s a dialog between a nymph (which is a kind of fairy) and a goblin. They’re debating about these “green glass beads on a silver ring” the nymph has stolen out of the moon. It’s a poem about obsession -- well, as much as it’s about anything -- and that’s pretty much the theme of my story.

Astrid: My novella No Life But This is set in Mexico City and follows Deven Shaw, a consultant for the Irregulars who is being paid to assist Agent Silas August in his investigation into the murder of his partner. Deven spent most of his life as a hostage in a hellish demon world, living as an assassin, and has to re-learn what it means to be human. Which is hard because Agent August isn’t really the helpful, patient kind of mentor one would desire. But he IS sizzling hot.

Ginn: [not here]

Nicole: Ginn???

Ginn: Sorry, I was spaced out looking at the donuts on the cover of Astrid Amara’s upcoming title, Miracle of the Bellskis, which is being released December 13th from Loose Id. I can’t wait for this sequel of Carol of the Bellskis to come out… also, I need to eat something.

Astrid: Yeah. Yeah do that. And while you’re eating, I’ll be reading The Rifter Part 10 by Ginn Hale, which is by the way, the LAST episode of this serialized novel. So if you hate waiting, and want to read all ten amazing parts one after another, now’s your chance!

Ginn: Yeah. And Josh’s Lone Star came out on the 5th, in Men Under the Mistletoe from Carina Press. Read that too.

Josh: Cowboys. They’re almost as yummy as doughnuts. Cowboys and Indi…er…jaded ballet dancers. Hey, it’s a Christmas story. Magical things happen. Anyway, it’s part of the Men Under the Mistletoe anthology, and all the stories are magically delicious.

Nicole: Man, I love holiday stories. Hey, wait! Stop plugging other companies you guys. This is a Blind Eye Books post!

Ginn: Maybe you should put donuts on the covers of more of your books.

Astrid: Yeah. Hanukkah donuts, bitches.

Josh: And gingerbread reindeer cookies with silver balls. The tiny shiny candy kind, I mean. That you buy in bake shops.

Nicole: ANYWAY…. Back to Irregulars. Ginn?

Ginn: Things Unseen and Deadly does not feature a sizzling hot agent and/or assassin, though Josh’s wicked cool Agent Rake does make an appearance. But for the most part my story is about Jason Shamir, a young unemployed musician who discovers that he has not been suffering from psychosis but was born with other-worldly vision. Which makes him a target of extra-human interest. It also allows him to see Agent Falk –

Nicole: - A dirty old bum –

Ginn: Yeah, but not to Jason, who can see who he really is. A kick ASS dirty old bum!

Astrid: Who swills poison and wears filthy clothes.

Josh: So hawt.

Ginn: And kicks ASS! Though I should say that Agent Rake also kicks ass. Come to think of it, Deven kicks ass too. And so does Gunther. Damn it! They ALL kick ass! This is a great anthology.

Josh: This is a kick ass anthology!

Nicole: Irregulars is available for print pre-order from our website and for digital pre-order from Weightlessbooks.com. Buy a print copy before January 1st, you get the digital edition free!

Thanks ladies and gents for participating. Tomorrow, we’ll let Astrid loose to have her wicked way with the characters from the anthology.

Astrid: Heh. Probe.

Nicole: Ew.

Note: We’re giving away a free digital pre-order of the Irregulars to one lucky commentor today.

Desert Island Giveaway #30

Giveaway: A Josh Lanyon two-fer!  1 winner will win both books in the Holmes & Moriarity series: 

Somebody Killed His Editor and All She Wrote

For sixteen years Christopher (Kit) Holmes has enjoyed a successful career as a mystery writer, thanks to the popularity of elderly spinster sleuth, Miss Butterwith and her ingenious cat, Mr. Pinkerton. But sales are down in everything but chick lit and Christopher’s new editor doesn’t like geriatric gumshoes. It’s a pink, pink world for Kit.

Reluctantly the reclusive Christopher agrees to attend a mystery writer’s conference at a remote Northern California winery. But no sooner does he arrive then the bridge to the outside world washes out. On his trek to the Blue Heron Lodge, Christopher discovers the body of a woman in the woods. If nearly two decades of mystery-writing are anything to go by, the woman doesn’t appear to have died a natural death.

Thanks to the ongoing storm and washed-out bridge, local law enforcement is not able to come to the rescue. Déjà vu! It’s practically like all those classic murder mysteries in isolated country manors that Christopher has been penning for sixteen years! If only Miss Butterwith was on hand. Or even Mr. Pinkerton....

A murderous fall down icy stairs is nearly all she wrote for Anna Hitchcock, the "American Agatha Christie." The cry for help from his old mentor cuts short mystery author Kit Holmes' romantic weekend with his new lover J.X. Moriarity, and lands him an amateur sleuth gig in an elegant snowbound mansion in the Berkshires.

Unfortunately, a clever killer is still one step ahead of Kit...

As with all of the giveaways you have until midnight (Pacific) today to enter. 

Good luck!

Leave email in comment section to enter.

Desert Island Giveaway #11

Giveaway: 2 ebooks by Josh Lanyon

Fair Game 

Icecapade (novellette)

(2 winners)

A crippling knee injury forced Elliot Mills to trade in his FBI badge for dusty chalkboards and bored college students. Now a history professor at Puget Sound University, the former agent has put his old life behind him -- but it seems his old life isn't finished with him.

A young man has gone missing from campus -- and as a favor to a family friend, Elliot agrees to do a little sniffing around. His investigations bring him face-to-face with his former lover, Tucker Lance, the special agent handling the case.

Things ended badly with Tucker, and neither man is ready to back down on the fight that drove them apart. But they have to figure out a way to move beyond their past and work together as more men go missing and Elliot becomes the target in a killer's obsessive game...

On the eve of the new millennium, diamond thief Noel Snow seduced FBI special agent Robert Cuffe, then fled into the dawn. Now a successful novelist, Noel uses his capers as fodder for his books, and has modeled his hero's nemesis (and potential love interest) on Cuffe. Though he leaves Robert a drunken phone message every New Year's Eve, Noel hasn't seen or heard from him in a decade.

So he's thrilled when his former lover shows up at his upstate farm one Christmas Eve. Elation quickly turns to alarm when Robert accuses Noel of being responsible for a recent rash of diamond heists. Robert is all business and as cold as ice -- it seems his only interest in Noel is to put him behind bars.

Innocent of the crimes, and still as attracted as ever to the oh-so-serious lawman, Noel plans a second seduction -- providing he can stay out of jail long enough!

As with all of the giveaways you have until midnight (Pacific) today to enter.

Good luck!

Leave email in comment section to enter.

Some (more) Tips On Finishing That Manuscript

LB Gregg again. Day III. Or as it's known in some parts: Shameless self-promotion cubed.

A quick reminder that what follows is not a top ten list, although now that I've spent yet another night slavishly whacking this fucker together, it still looks like a top ten list. That's okay. Go with it.

This post is the second in a two part series I have dubbed~

The Dos and Don'ts of Writing (and finishing) Your First Draft

... in Three Part Harmony...

with a Rainbow of Colors

...and Personalities.

(i.e. another Lisabea Top 10 9 List)

As you may recall, I invited my pal Josh Lanyon and his pal (now our pal, too) Harper Fox to discuss everyone's favorite topic--sex. I mean writing.

Why are we not discussing sex?

Ahem. Writing. More specifically, we're talking about finishing the first draft. Yada yada. On with the show.

LB Gregg's RED ink because she's writing this in blood. Muahahahaha.
Josh Lanyon seems a little BLUE.
Harper Fox is our GREEN M&M today. Nom nom. Nom. She should be Red cuz of the hair. I should be green cuz of my eyes.

I should have planned this better.

Here we go!

#5 Do keep your thesaurus beside you at all times;

Don't stop to use it.

You try finding a fun picture for 'thesaurus'.

LB: baking, blazing, blistering, boiling, broiling, burning, muy caliente, febrile, fevered, feverish, feverous, fiery, flaming,heated, humid, igneous, incandescent, like anoven, nom nom, on fire, ovenlike, parching, piping, recalescent, red*, roasting, scalding, scorching, searing, sizzling, smoking, steaming,

#6 Do shamelessly structure everything around your favourite juicy bits and sex scenes. If the edifice collapses, let it go down with a squelch.

LB: I like that. I'm printing it and putting it on my bulletin board. All love scenes should squelch.

Harper: (fans herself / squelches delicately) I made it to your bulletin board?!

LB: You complete me, Harper.

Josh: I'm thinking maybe I should leave you two alone for a bit. :-D I'll go revise my manuscript some more.

Harper: It's okay, you can come back. I'm weary now and calming down. Hormonal surges only available in business hours at my time of life, I'm afraid. But it was fun, Lisabea...

#6 (b)Don't be afraid to let go of a plot-line that's not panning out. Tcha, six hours of my life I can't get back!

Josh: That's a hard one, but it's painfully true. Which is where keeping an elephant's graveyard file can help. You're not ripping it out, you're...saving it for later.

Harper: I have lots of files like that. Ahhh, d'you remember "Flynn's POV bin"? That's a rich source. Oh, here's another "don't"...

#7 don't use the same dead elephant twice.

Even by accident. Sheesh, that was a close call.

LB: We all have characters named Finn? I move to ban the name Finn from further m/m novels. All in favor?

Josh:Flynn, you wacko. Have you been hitting the spiked lapsang souchong again? But I agree in principle. No more Flynns or Finns. Unless we do sequels of the originals. Is it just me or are there flashfire fads in m/m character names?

LB: Do you have a Finch? I'm worried. Suddenly.

Josh: Seriously, though, those old files are very useful. Stories that I dug out of my "deleted" files...Cards on the Table, The Ghost Wore Yellow Socks, and I Spy Something Bloody. Keep it all. You never know when something is going to prove useful.

LB: Without the now deceased Mr. Riley file--oh shame and woe-- In and Out wouldn't exist. I delete much of the day to day stuff--they're all just words-- but the good stuff? I squirrel those away.

Harper:Flynn, Finn, Shminn. I can't even remember. All I know is, he had a POV and it needed to go. (Not true. I endlessly adore him.) Yes, flashfires, definitely. The author in the very next review down from minehad a Matt and Aaron, too. We both turned up wearing the same frock. I'm sure nobody noticed.

#8 Do warn your loved ones. It's kind of like R&D PMS.

Don't take a huff because a Loved One says s/he doesn't like a character's name. "Name" is different to "idea", "concept" and "whole thing".

(Recent bitter experience, anyone?)

Josh: There is power in names. Ask any fantasy writer. It's very hurtful when one's dearest and nearest snicker at a protagonist's name. What is so darned funny about Colin Bliss? I ask you!

LB: I guess this isn't a good time to mention Mark Hardewick? NOT snickering.

Harper: I swear down to you, and will go find it if you insist, that I have a Star Trek novel in my - er - collection (that I'm looking after for a friend) where the aliens are called Alt and Macro. Swear down.

LB: G calls Caesar Romano --Salad with Cheese.

Josh: Now that's romance. Actually, that blend of comedy and sexy isromantic.

On that note: #9 Do ignore the input of your SO; Don't ignore the input of your CP.

Josh: But pretend that you value the input of your SO just as much as you value the input of your CP.

Harper: Don't pretend you know what a CP is when you don't. I thought I'd try and wing it but all I can think of is "civilian partner". (gasps) Is that it?! Do you folks have, like, backup SOs for when you're off-duty?!

LB: CP is the person who, traditionally, uses a red pen ( pre-editor ) to poke you right in the manuscript. In this case, we'll pretend that some critique specialists use blue ink.

Josh: Critique Partner. We only hurt the ones we love.

Harper: Ah! Ah-ha-ha-ha. I'm relieved, undeceived, and just that touch disappointed.

~~CONTEST~~

There are 9 Dos and Don'ts (well 8--one is just a Don't)--you'll have to also refer to the conversation from yesterday. All you need to do is guess who came up with which pair (numbered below). Some of these are pretty easy -okay all of them should be easy. We have distinct voices.

Here they are:

1. Do finish & Don't whine.
2. Do save everything. And at the very least email yourself a copy of the day's work.Don't come home late and drunk from a party and start working on your rough draft.
3. Do fall in love with your leads, even the b*stards, as soon as you possibly can. Passion lubricates graft. Don't throw discarded ideas anywhere you wouldn't want to reach into and get them back. The bin is okay before discarded Chinese food. Not after.
4. When you're stuck, DO skip to the part where you know what happens next. Don't fool around on the internet with your friends. Or at least--know when to stop.
5. Do keep your thesaurus beside you at all times; Don't stop to use it.
6. Do shamelessly structure everything around your favourite juicy bits and sex scenes. If the edifice collapses, let it go down with a squelch. Don't be afraid to let go of a plot-line that's not panning out. Tcha, six hours of my life I can't get back!
7. Don't use the same dead elephant twice. Even by accident. Sheesh, that was a close call.
8. Do warn your loved ones. It's kind of like R&D PMS. Don't take a huff because a Loved One says s/he doesn't like a character's name. "Name" is different to "idea", "concept" and "whole thing".
9. Do ignore the input of your SO; Don't ignore the input of your CP.

I'll choose three winners. What's up for grabs? The upcoming Lanyon, A Vintage Affair; the upcoming Fox, Life After Joe; and a signed copy of Smart Ass 2: Pressure Point (aka Happy Ending in PRINT) from yours truly, LB Gregg.

I'll announce the winner on Wednesday, June 23rd.

LB

Some Tips On Finishing That Manuscript

LB Gregg here. I'm back. I know you're pleased. This is not a top ten list, although now that I've spent all night putting it together, it sure as hell looks like one. This post is actually the first in a two part series I like to call~

The Dos and Don'ts of Writing (and finishing) Your First Draft

... in Three Part Harmony...

with a Rainbow of Colors

...and Personalities.

( In other words--Christ what a hot mess, which, incidentally, looks exactly like another LB Top 10 List, Little Miss.)

I've invited my pal Josh Lanyon and his pal (now my pal and soon to be your pal, too) Harper Fox to discuss everyone's favorite topic--writing. More specifically, finishing the dreaded first draft. All those empty pages. All those ideas drying up faster than the ink they're written with. All the distractions, internal and external, that keep us from our end goal--creating a full manuscript.

Tomorrow, after part II, we'll dismount with a guessing game. The lucky winners will each receive one book from one of the three of us. Does that make any kind of sense? Yes.

So:

LB Gregg's RED ink reinforces the unwavering passion she has about this gripping subject matter.
Josh Lanyon commands the scene in BLUE.
Harper is sleek and somehow even more delectably British in GREEN.

#1 Do finish & Don't whine.

LB: This is particularly important if you are behind schedule and your mentor has been, er, encouraging you for five months to finish without whining. Not that I, LB Gregg, have any experience here.

Josh: It's okay to whine to the select few, but you have to keep moving even as you whine.

Harper: If I finish, can I whine afterwards? There's got to be an outlet, a proper time and place, a... the word I'm looking for is whin(e)dow.

#2 Do save everything.
And at the very least email yourself a copy of the day's work.

Don't come home late and drunk from a party

and start working on your rough draft.

LB: RE: Drinking. This is also good advice for blogging, posting, commenting, and speaking with your SO about that recent visit to Nordstrom. Those shoes were on sale.

Josh: Yes, I should add here that friends don't let friends drink and write. Especially blog posts. Thank God the three of us only drink tea.

Harper: Indeed it is a blessing, though lapsang souchong works well with a splash of rum, oddly enough. Very cleansing. Clears the cerebellum in no time.

LB: She's onto something there.

# 3 Do fall in love with your leads, even the b*stards, as soon as you possibly can. Passion lubricates graft.

Yes. I've used it before. Still funny!

LB: **12 year old boy snicker** She said lubricate.**snicker snicker snicker**

Josh: Also, make sure you sufficiently disguise the fictional bastards from the real life bastards they're based on. Assuming you lift from real life. Well, I mean there is that write-what-you-know thing.

Harper: Hah. I did say "lubricate". I'm not afraid to use naughty words now, even long ones. And yes, Miz Bea, I know what you're up to up there. Wow, Josh - did somebody recognise himself? :-D

Josh: Everyone seems to recognize himself! It's very disconcerting.

LB: I totally don't have this problem. Unless it's regarding Adrien. He was obviously created solely for me to love.

Harper: I did have someone who wanted to recognise himself, and I didn't have the heart to disillusion him! I'm flattered, really. Should have added a "very loosely based on some aspects of the life of" acknowledgement.

#3 (b) Don't throw discarded ideas anywhere you wouldn't want to reach into and get them back. The bin is okay before discarded Chinese food. Not after.

Josh: **Snicker** I hate it when the sweet and sour gets all over my finest work. By the way, it helps if you name files something that you can remember a few months from now. Initials can be troubling. KWIM?

Harper: (snicker) (OMG, you've made me do it now. I'll be writing multi-billion-selling vampire quadrilogies any second now) You said kwim!!!

LB: I'm not in on this joke, but if that kwim is quivering, I'm outie.

#4 When you're stuck, DO skip to the part where you know what happens next.

Don't fool around on the Internet with your friends.

Or at least--know when to stop.

Josh: I like this one a lot -- sometimes I skip to the next project where I know what's going on.

Harper: I would just like to know what's going on. Generally.

LB: I usually don't know what's going on. Who are you people?

Josh: Shh, shh. Have a Life Saver, Sweetbea.

Harper: Yes, everything's fine. We're just the monsters you created.

/pt one

Stay tuned for the stunning conclusion--and keep note! You'll have to decide who came up with which set of rules--Harper, LB or Josh.

~LB

And The Winner Is....

The winners of Josh Lanyon and Lisabea/LB Gregg's Thanksgiving Q & A are as follows... (contestants were randomized via random.org).

The winner of the Josh Lanyon book:
There were 26 items in your list. Here they are in random order:

1. Tracy
2. Cosmosnaut
3. whateverfor
4. Kimnik
5. Mei Leng
6. Winterbird
7. SiNn
8. Liz
9. Bev (QB)
10. Renee
11. Joder
12. jukebox
13. Siruislyserio
14. Sula
15. anonymous #1
16. nichem
17. Marcy
18. Kati
19. poximon
20. s7anna
21. Jenre
22. Sarah
23. Kris
24. anonymous #2
25. Tam
26. Janice

The winner of the LB Gregg book:
There were 26 items in your list. Here they are in random order:

1. Kris
2. Sarah
3. jukebox
4. Janice
5. Marcy
6. Jenre
7. anonymous #2
8. Tam
9. Joder
10. s7anna
11. Cosmonaut
12. Mei Leng
13. SiNn
14. Tracy
15. poximon
16. whateverfor
17. anonymous #1
18. Bev (QB)
19. Winterbird
20. Siruislyserio
21. Kati
22. Liz
23. Renee
24. Sula
25. nichem
26. kimnik

Congratulations to the winners! Please email Lisabea at noseinabook@live.com to collect your winnings. :)

Two Turkeys.

Happy Thanksgiving Q & A With

Josh and Lisabea

As usual, when I pop by the Island, I like to bring my pal Josh Lanyon for an alcoholic bev and some witty repartee. Today we're offering ten questions to each other and to readers, PLUS a prize or two.

So Josh asks five, and I, Lisabea/LBea/LB Gregg ask five, but we all have to answer ten. Here we go!

(I am in Blue; Josh Lanyon is in brown, because he's just STUNNING in brown).

JOSH LANYON WANTS TO KNOW--

Josh: Okay, here are my questions and answers:

1 - The last fluid to pass your lips.

Do we count the rinsing away of toothpaste? No! The SO just appeared with Irish Coffee. TGIF! Yum.

LBea: Coffee. It's always coffee! I need to add some new fluids to my life.

Josh: 2 - Who was the last person you had an argument with -- and why?

I'm in the middle of a huge argument with someone though I haven't told her yet. Believe it or not, I actually hate confrontation, so while I can fly off the handle when it's not that big a deal, when the hurt goes deep I've generally got nothing to say. It's lockdown time. She's dead to me.

As for why...? YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME, LISABEA.

Kiiiiiiiding.

LBea: I'm not speaking to you. I am your bf. You would never hold back.

::bites nails::

Josh's Daily Vitamin

Josh: 3 - Is Irish Coffee a vitamin? (LBea interrupts: YES) Seriously, I take a boring vitamin supplement because my diet is shit. Well, not literally. And I take vitamin B and Omega fish oil stuff.

LBea: I was taking vitamins, but I always forget. I'm more likely to take Motrin.

Josh: 4 - What holiday chore do you most dread?

I dread them ALL. Mostly because I haven't done any of them. I guess I dread starting the list of chores the most, because once I'm in that mode, it will be okay. It's like war. Thinking about battle is much worse than...hmmm. Maybe not such a good analogy. I do hope the turkey won't be shooting back this year.

LBea: My new holiday dread is wall papering the hallway ever again.

Josh: 5 - Name one book you read as a teenager that influenced you.

As a teenager...I read voraciously. And I tended to take everything very seriously. I think this is true of a of books we read when we're young. It seems like...this is gospel, this is how the world is, and these initial storytellers carry great weight. Which is why it really is a huge responsibility as to what we let children and teens read. I remember I read a great deal from the Scholastic bookclub. Anyone remember that? And one book was about this guy named David and his friend...and I can't remember the friend's name, but he's a conscientious objector and he dies in Viet Nam. There's something about David's father accusing the friend of being gay, but to be honest, a lot of that went right over my head at the time. I mean, I was still waiting for the Black Stallion to show up in my life.

LBea: Snort. I'll send you a My Little Pony.

I've said Dancer's of Arun before--but I'm going to go with Fern Michael's Captive Surrender (or was it Embrace?). I was in high school and it was my first lady pirate romance. I wrote an English paper about becoming a lady pirate and I received a glowing A from my teacher who thought I was 'so interesting'--but sekretly I was reading pron!

LBEA BOLDLY ASKS--

LBea: 6) What's your fav. real Christmas song and your favorite pretend Holiday song? I know this is precipitous. I don't care.

I'm such a WASP--Once in Royal David City is my fav real song. And I love Mariah singing O Holy Night in that video when she's in church with her bubbies hanging out and she's in a Jessica Rabbit Red Dress vamping it up for baby Jesus. Now that's what I call Christmas!

Josh - The Rebel Jesus. But here's where I confess that I love Christmas music. It is SO uncool. But I do. Pretend fave? Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas. I love all those jazzy, vintage-y Chestnuts Saved From the Fire faves. Ideally sung by Ella or Frankie or Der Bingle or Satchmo.

LBea: 7) What's the last thing your love said to you this morning?

You're so hot I can't keep my hands off you. I want you all the time.

What? I am not making that up!

Josh: "How's your head?"

He was talking about my headache of the night before, I hasten to add. Serious here!

LBea: 8) Thanksgiving Question: Dressing in the bird, or on the side in some pansy little dish?

Stuff that mother! In the bird! Also stuffing should have lots of sausage. Mmmmm...sausage.

Josh - You don't know where that bird has been! Side dish. It's an ongoing bone of contention in this household, by the way. I am all about the side dishes.

LBea: 9) What movies can you watch again and again, you know the lines, can jump in at any time, and will stop everything to watch it on TV even though you have it on DVD (and VHS)?

Monty Python's Holy Grail--and School of Rock, Moonstruck, The Bird Cage, and (Colin Firth) Pride and Prejudice. I like to laugh and I love love.

Josh - And we love to laugh at you. WITH YOU. Seriously, though...Gunga Din, Young Frankenstein, The Big Sleep...any episode of The Professionals.

Adrien English

LBea: 10) What's your newest addition to your Desert Island Keeper list?

Mine is The Dark Tide. BOOYAH!!!!

Josh- What?! You can't pick a book that isn't published yet. Pick something else. (LBea: No. Make me.) Meanwhile...what am I supposed to pick when I haven't read anything in months??? Books I am taking with me to DIY island...Dash and Dingo by Sean Kennedy, Three Wrong Turns in the Desert by Neil Plakcy...okay, I will take recommends on this. OH, I know. Ginn Hale's sequel to Wicked Gentlemen. When's that coming out? ( I am NOT making fun of you, Sweetbea).

So. Answer the Ten Questions by Monday Morning 7 am (I can't do midnight Sunday, sorry. Am too tired) and you may be selected to win a copy of Dangerous Grounds II: Old Poison! And an LB Gregg your choice Smithfield novella.

The Questions Again:

1 - The last fluid to pass your lips.

2 - Who was the last person you had an argument with -- and why?

3 - Is Irish Coffee a vitamin?

4 - What holiday chore do you most dread?

5 - Name one book you read as a teenager that influenced you.

6) What's your fav. real Christmas song and your favorite pretend Holiday song?

7) What's the last thing your love said to you this morning?

8) Thanksgiving Question: Dressing in the bird, or on the side in some pansy little dish?

9) What movies can you watch again and again, you know the lines, can jump in at any time, and will stop everything to watch it on TV even though you have it on DVD (and VHS)?

10) What's your newest addition to your Desert Island Keeper list?

YAY.

Strange Offer

Jake Riordan (see photo) from the Adrien English Mysteries my DIK hut is here today to tell you about a very Strange Offer.

Jake: No. I'm not.

LBea: Why must you be difficult? I just need you to step up on this box, right here, and tell people about the one time, special offer, interview with the love of your life, Adrien--

Jake: I never said that.

LBea: Out loud--no, but, sweetie, you totally love him.

Jake: ::sighs:: What do you want me to do?

LBea; Tell everyone about the interview you guys did with your very good friend, Josh Lanyon.

Jake: Friend? Did Lanyon tell you that? I think you misunderstand the meaning of that word.

LBea: I don't! I think you're just mad because everyone thinks you're a nit and it's slightly his fault.

Jake: ::stony silence::

LBea: I don't think you're a nit.

Jake: Get on with it, LBea. And keep that bastard Nate Hawkins away from my side of the hut. He calls me 'boy' one more time...

LBea shudders delicately: That is so....sexy.

Jake: You have your alpha beta pairings confused.

LBea: Do I? Just tell the ladies here on the Island what's going on, and I'll keep Nate from spanking you. Yes? That's a good deal. Then I can give some free books away, drink my Jamaican Butter Rum coffee, and write my own books!

Jake: Who the hell is this guy?

LBea: You like? He looks like ADRIEN! No?

Jake: No. Here's the news. Pay attention. I'm only saying this once.

::crinkle of paper::

A Strange Offer

Order Strange Fortune, the new spec fiction novel by Josh Lanyon through the Blind Eye Books website by midnight on November 20^th and uncover a small fortune in exclusive promotional plunder.

Jake: Did you just make me say 'plunder'?

LBea: Nope. Not I.

Order between November 5th and November 20th and receive:

• Sketches of Hidush. A PDF sketch book containing 6 pages of gorgeous original illustrations from Strange Fortune by noted artist Dawn Kimberling.

• A Cookbook for Gentlemen featuring one recipe from each of Josh’s works. From Italian margaritas to rabbit pie, there’s something for every appetite in this little gem.

• Adrien and Jake: A Private Conversation. Josh’s most popular characters answer a host of questions posed by their creator and a score of readers in this “private” interview.

• “The French Have a Name for It.” An original short story by Josh Lanyon. This story is only a

vailable through this offer.

• Vintage bookplate template of mysterious swami chap.


Remember, like all things magical…there’s a catch. You must order before midnight on November 20th. When the clock strikes twelve all this lovely loot vanishes like white smoke from a Hidushi temple sacrifice.


LBea: See that wasn't painful at all. Thank you, Jakey. ::pats hand::

Jake: Well, the cookbook looks interesting.

***In honor of my birthday, which is All Saints Day, and rightly so, I'm tossing two copies of Josh's I Spy Something Wicked out to the crowd. It's a Halloween story. Happy Birthday to me!

Just leave a comment in the, er, comment section, and I'll pick someone by midnight on Sunday. WOOT!

Jake: Does that DIK banner say all the heroes here are naked in their huts?

LBea leers: Yup. Even you, sweetie.

Libations with LBea and Lanyon

Today I've asked my sometimes DIK blogging partner, Josh Lanyon (from this point in red-- smexy!) to c'mon over to the island and pull up a hammock.

My...hic...pleasure, madame!

Careful with that tray, dear! Don't spill the Lagavulin!

Whoopsie!

It's nice to be back, thanks for having us both. Stay tuned for a give away and shameless book pimpage. But first:

Josh and I talk about booze.

Hey! We're on a tropical beach! It's a given.

I'm always intrigued by what folks order at the bar, and while I'm the last girl to ever order a Mojito (There are weeds floating in that thing.) I love to have fancy knick-knacks poking out of my coconut when I'm lying in a hammock. I also enjoy trying exciting new things like Pop Rocks Martinis. Don't judge me!

Push that tray just a leeedle...right. Ta.

But...do, actually. Because what we choose to drink can often reveal a little piece about who we are. Creature of habit? Sugar fiend? Pretentious a-hole? Wall flower with a secret wild side? When I met my fair Rosie, she was knocking back a G&T at the bar in San Fran and I knew right then and there that she was a gutsy broad who knew exactly what she wanted in life. Is that a stretch? OMG, do you know her? Anyway, I was smashed on iced house Pino Grigio. Does that mean I'm a cheap date with no understanding of wine?

You totally get da whine, my Sweetbea.

Now, my pal Josh, is partial to a delicious Italian Margarita now and again. heh. I think it's fair to say that he's festive with a sultry twist...and he can hold his liquor. Or not. (CAN YOU? Let's see!)

Recipe? Did someone ask for an Italian margie recipe? I sort of do it by sight and taste but the recipe I base it on is this one:

1 oz Amaretto
2 oz Sweet and Sour mix (I use regular margarita mix)
1/2 oz Jose Cuervo Especial Gold Tequila
1/2 oz Grand Marnier (can sub Triple Sec)

That's one drink! They're quite strong, but very good. You can rim the glass in sugar or salt -- which ever you prefer, and you can either pour the mix in the blender with ice -- or you can just do it over the rocks.

What's in your glass?

Ever notice what your fav characters are drinking? If they drink at all? Authors make deliberate choices, based on what they want to reveal about good guys, and bad guys. In Death of a Pirate King, Adrien ::come back here!:: has an on going experience over a certain beverage that eventually leads him to a bigger revelation. Everything he knows about this drink churns round and round in his mind. What he drinks, if he chooses to drink, who he's drinking with, and the fact that he shouldn't be engaging at all, are intrinsic to our understanding of both his character and the story itself.

I never noticed till I started putting the quiz together how...um...much my characters drink. Actually, kidding aside, alcoholism runs like a river through my family. So it's something I'm conscious of. Frankly, I love to drink, but I sort of have an addictive personality, so I keep an eye on myself. Two eyes if I've had a lot. Juuuust kidding.

Nah. I hear you on that. Same with me...I'm far more talk than action.



I'm not that kind of girl!

Remember the familiar regency scene where a young virginal ingenue has too much champagne at her come out and winds up in the clutches of the manipulative, horny hero? She was not that type of girl, was she? But with a bit of bubbly she can both blame the alcohol and regret her actions later (usually in the form of a hangover or a pregnancy) and still we get to see the major physical break through with the love interest. And what's great is that his reaction plays a part here as well. Does he save her? Does he take advantage of her? Is he amused? Angry? Does anyone reveal true feelings? It's device employed by the best and the worst.

And yes, I resort to the alcohol induced lovin' in Gobsmacked. Because, lets face it, this stuff really does happen in RL and sometimes, its the perfect opportunity for characters to get it on.

So what do they drink? What's the beverage of choice? And do you, fair readers, pay attention? I know that Adrien English, hut mate of mine, loves his TAB. Ew. But it tells me so much about his hope to stay trim, his love of soda, and the failure of his obviously underdeveloped taste buds.

It's an acquired taste. The absinthe of soft drinks.

And now...Mixology One-oh-One.

I spy something...wet.

For a copy of both The Dark Horse and The White Knight you'll need to match the hero to his missing beverage.

Heroes:

Adrien English

Jake Riordan

Sean Fairchild

Daniel Moran

Nathan Doyle

Will Brandt

Tim Martin

Gabriel Sandalini

Perry Foster

Christopher Holmes

The Concoctions:

hot cocoa

Boilermaker

Chocolate martini

Martini
Anything alcoholic
Pulque
Henley Skullfarquar

VAT 69

Sam Houston bourbon

Gin and tonic



Good luck, and even if you don't know, take a wee guess.

and remember: Read Responsibly!

The Inverview: Josh Lanyon

Invester-reviewer-gatoring
LBea and TPig Style
(Yes. That's Us)

Scene I

The sun glistens through the back of the Rolls Royce window as LBea and TPig look out into the lush green surroundings of Beverly Hills apparently hung-over.

TPig: Turns, snorts and stares into the camera.


LB: Do I smell like booze, TP? That would be a bad thing, right? Do I still have lime in my hair? Damn it, I am never going to drink tequila shots with you again. *reaches for banaca and sprays both TPig and herself. Twice.*

TPig: Is this thing on *shakes the lens*...

Oh shit! Hi every one and welcome to a special edition of Dueling Reviews. LBea and I are on our way to the mansion of mad skills M/M Romance writer Josh Lanyon.

LB: What? I thought we were interviewing Adrien English? Wait. Who?

The Rolls pulls up to a post modern mansion that looks like a Frank Lloyd Wright cupcake with extra sprinkles. LBea in a sharply tailored silk suit (SIZE TWO I SWEAR) and TPig in a grungy leather jacket and jeans he threw on when he regained consciousness stroll up the wall of glass that looks to be the main entrance and knock on the brushed stainless steel monument from 2001: A Space Odyssey or a door… take your pick.

LB: Hi! Everyone! It's been a while, but that's only because TP and I have been employing our investigative reviewing skills to find the mysterious and reclusive mystery romance author .....dramatic PAUSE *the camera swings wildly to see someone crawling through the bushes*..... Adrien English!...who I believe is trying to sneak out through the servants entrance.


Josh: Huh?

LBea: *While TP throws himself on the guy and wrestles the slender, almost frail looking young man to the ground* --Careful PIGGIE!!! He's got an empty wine bottle-- I'll fill you in about our author du jour. uh. If that's actually him.

Josh: *Locked in mortal or immortal combat with TP* -- Actually who—er—whom?


LBea: *Turns to camera crew.* Maybe we should ask for some ID?

TPig: *Hits the back of the guys head* Quit biting me goddamn it!

*They get off the ground slowly brushing away the moist mulch*

The man coughs and spits out "FOR THE LAST TIME: I am NOT Adrien English!"

LB: Oohhh. He's so feisty TPig! I like 'em with little bite! * pats young man and speaks very slowly* OK, honey. You can be anyone you want to be. TPig and I know all about role playing. May we come in? Cuz my skirts a little snug and I think I popped a couple buttons. *winks to TPig* Then you can tell us all about your secret identity.

TPig: Sorry about tackling you like that. I take it you are Josh Lanyon? *offering his hand*

Josh: *Ignoring the handshake and glaring at Lisabea who tries to straighten his collar* -- WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?!

TPig: We are here from Desert Island Keepers to do an interview. I could have sworn they told you we were coming.

An uncomfortable look crosses Adri—Josh’s face. His eyes dart here and there—although they do not go so far as to shoot daggers or flame.

Josh:*Picking a blade of grass off his tongue* -- Well, since you’re here...

Scene II

Josh leads us into the house. Gigantic Black Leather and chrome furniture is strewn about like some bad 80's bachelor's pad.

TPig: How long have you lived here Josh?

Josh: We don’t. That is—

LBea: We? Oooh. Dish!

Josh remains silent.

Passing through the immense house every other wall has some type of book shelf containing stacks of books that look to be still in the process of being arranged

LBea: What’s up with all these books everywhere? You know Pottery Barn has great knick knacks. *picks up pirate book end and surreptitiously slips it into her bag*

Josh: Books? Oh. We had a fire recently at the bookstore. The arson inspector said something about—

LBea: Bookstore?

Josh: Gives her a long look. He leads us finally into the kitchen. Eggs and bacon are sizzling on the stove. Coffee is brewing. He opens the fridge and takes out a Tab.

TPig: I think a rum and coke would be nice.

Josh pauses, pulling the Tab tab.

LBea: Rum sounds refreshing!

Josh *Sighs* -- I suppose—

A voice is heard down a small hallway off the kitchen. Baby, Where the hell is my shampoo? I couldn’t find it in any of the boxes. There’s just this apple-smelling crap! *Out walks a towering burly blond man with a hand towel around his waist. He sees LBea and stops.*

Josh *Blanching* -- Oh. Uh…Detective—I mean, Lieutenant Riordan. Good to see you! All of you. We—I—some people—guests—dropped by. Too. Some people dropped by too. Like you.

Jake *Puzzled* -- Some "people guests"? Baby, have you been overdoing the meds again? *He jumps as LBea accidentally snags the towel. (and it WAS an ACCIDENT!)

Jake – Hey, that is assaulting a police officer, young woman! *He backs quickly down the hallway, one large manly hand modestly not even beginning to cover God’s bounty.

LBea & TP watch, their eyes on the prize.

Josh *Faintly* Uh...Yeah. er...Why don't you two make yourself comfortable on the patio and I'll...um....bring you drinks or something. *He picks up phone while pointing to the back of the house.*.

LBea: Sure Adri... I mean Josh, sure. I'm just going to check out..I mean use your powder room, m'kay, Adr-osh?

Josh's head whips up. -- Wha --? Oh. Use the guest bath downstairs. It's...cleaner. Really.

LBea is gone already whipping down the small hallway. She suddenly swings into another room. TPig and then Josh wanders in behind her. There is a humongous four poster bed towering over the room its sheets are rumpled and look recently slept in. LBea seems to be looking under the bed throwing out books as she finds them.

LBea: Skinflick? Who's David Bedwetter?

Josh: Hey! I said, use the guest bath! *he snatches the stack of books from LBea's dainty paws* -- Bedstetter, you insolent slut. I mean, BRANDstetter. Don't tell me you haven't read the Brandstetter series? Joseph Hansen? The first gay mystery writers I discovered were Joseph Hansen and Richard Stevenson. That was actually a bad thing because it set the bar so high and everything that came after those two was sort of...hmmm. But Hansen -- and Stevenson with the Donald Strachey series --

LBea: Who's Donald Scratchy? How did you know I was insolent?

Josh *absently reaching out to wipe brown smudge from LBea's forehead*

LBea: It's hair dye. I had a thing. Just ignore it. *wipes forehead again and GLARES at Josh English*

Josh: STRACHEY. Jeez. You people don't get out much, do you? Donald Strachey. He's a PI. They made him into a TV show on the here! channel. *now Josh is on a roll and no one can get a word in edgewise* Michael Nava was a very good stylist, but I never really warmed to the Henry Rios character and I found the books depressing. And then I discovered Mark Richard Zubro. Hooboy!

LBea *crawling back under bed. Buttons fly.* -- Hooboy? Would you like to comment?

Josh - No comment! No, I take that back. The plotting wasn't too bad in the early stuff, but the characters...flatter than pancakes. RD Zimmerman wrote an enjoyable series. I liked a couple of Lev Raphael's novels. I read everything I could lay my hands on, of course, but not everything worked for me. Fred Hunter, Michael Craft, and Greg Herren: all were skilled at what they did, but none of those clicked for me in the way you need a series to click in order to love it. I started out loving John Morgan Wilson's Benjamin Justice series, but it lost me along the way, and I can't explain why or how.

TPig *manages to smother yawn. He opens eyes very wide, trying to focus*

LBea: My Dearest Holmes? Don't you have any Batman comics? Jeeze.

Josh: HEY! That is a first edition! *He grabs books and shuffles through them, still babbling to himself still under the over-medicated impression that we came here to talk about books* This is one of my favorite oddball one offs -- you know, the books that are forever in my keeper pile: My Dearest Holmes by Rohase Piercy, Cowboy Blues by Steven Lewis, The Night G.A.A. Died by Jack Ricardo. Oh, and a very funny Australian writer by the name of Phillip Scott -- One Dead Diva. I think it was actually the first book in a series though I never found the other books....

LBea reaches under the bed and pulls out the police uniform and the handcuffs and then unsnaps the gun holster and holds up a dildo. Hey, TPig get a load at this! *turns to stare.* I'm shocked, Josh. Really.

Josh: *sucks in a sharp breath and squeaks* How did that...

Jake wanders in now in a bath robe: Adrien, baby, have you seen my old uniform? I have to go to that Policeman's Ball Fundraiser this afternoon and...

Scene III

Josh is quickly escorting the gruesome twosome off the premises.

Josh: Hey, I am SO sorry, Mr. Teapot and Miss Sweetbig, but I forgot that I have a lunch date with my mother in half an hour. I must leave...

LB: ::muttering:: I'm not big.....I'm medium.

TPig: No problem but one more question for our readers. What do you find sexy in PI's? I mean, obviously besides blond and burly and hung.

Josh: Sexy? What is this sexy of which you speak? You know what's sexy? Intelligence is sexy -- especially when mixed with humor. *Oh, God, he is off and running again with the blah, blah, blah* I think the sexy characters are the ones who have a good sense of self -- without taking themselves, or life, too seriously. Confidence without arrogance. And competency is very attractive. In real life and in fiction. But then I also have a softness for vulnerable neurotics -- who knows what that's about!

TPig: Uh, yeah. Thanks for your time, Josh. Josh?

Josh *still happily chattering to himself* -- I do like those wisecracking PIs of the thirties and forties. Tough guys with a soft side or ordinary guys who can get tough if they've got to. Raymond Chandler's Phillip Marlowe -- oh, Georgette Heyer's heroes in historical mystery. Two of my all time favorite characters were Peter Stewart in Barbara Michaels' Prince of Darkness and Brat Farrar in Josephine Tey's Brat Farrar. I like a lot of Dick Francis' characters...

Josh or Adrien or whoever he is climbs into a green Subaru Forester, Jake at the wheel. He’s still rambling on to himself as the tires squeal. Apparently, they are on their way to lunch with the mum.

LBea: *gazes into camera swilling a beverage* Well that's a wrap. From the home of the extraordinarily bor--er...talkative Adrien Lanyon, TPig and I want to thank you for riding along with us on another adventure. And on behalf of our sponsors, the Desert Island Keeper folks, we'd like to....take...uh...yeah....

LBea loses interest and wanders off to find a refill.

The camera zooms in on TPig, alone, sipping a cocktail and staring with interest at a chalk outline on the lawn.