You're all living in a butterfly-farting fantasy world where Valentine's Day provides the means and opportunity for so-called lovers to try and maim or kill one another.
And as for all those heroes and heroines that you love reading about??
Yeah, so not going to last.
Kris' Top 5 Romance Couples That Would Never, Ever Make It And You Know It (in no particular order):
1. Romeo and Juliet wouldn't have lasted. Why? Child marriage always ends up in a trailer park with one of the spouses running off and leaving the other with the kids. It's like a law or something. Case closed.
2. Adam and Eve wouldn't have lasted. Why? As the Mumma said, if Adam had a go at Eve for eating an apple, God only knows what he would have done if she'd tried chocolate. Case closed.
3. Heathcliffe and Catherine wouldn't have lasted. Why? Let's face it, they were both psychos and their relationship would have ended up with one or both of them in a mental institution or in prison for murder. Case closed.
4. Darcy and Elizabeth wouldn't have lasted. Why? Oh, c'mon. The pride and the prejudice thing?? Hello. Case closed.
5. Rhett and Scarlet wouldn't have last-... hang on a minute... they didn't. Case closed.
That's me. Which romance couple do you think wouldn't have lasted?