Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Are You A Epilogue Junkie? - Read The Following Warning Signs


Epi-lo-guian n. 1. a. One who has an insatiable interest or devotion in reading about characters' future circumstances. Someone who is so co-dependently attached to the story that when ended abruptly, feels a sense of loss, discontent and unfulfillment. 
Source: smokinhotpedia


We at Smokinhotbooks (K-Khan and KC) are avid epiloguians, or epilogue junkies. We become so obsessed about the future events of our beloved main characters that one of us even reads then end of the book to ensure the happily ever after is up to snuff. Ehem- K.C. 
  

Are YOU a Epilogue Junkie?? (please read the following symptoms/warning signs below)

1. You pass by white picket fences and immdiately think of Bella and Zadist from (Lover Awakened ) and ponder on how their youngin' is getting along.

2. After reading Josh Lanyon's Adrien English Series you often rehearse and act out a epilogue of your own where Adrien and Jake can be seen frolicking as lovers would on the beach, watching their dog Scout race after the seagulls. 

3. You've 'Live Journaled' (in vivd x-rated detail) about Mac and Barrons having moved well beyond the lust stage and are madly in love living in a delightful paradise after saving the world. (Karen Marie Moning's 'Dark series)

4.  If a story does not mention the utter happiness of the characters are some later event, you are left feeling bereft, cheated, adding on a tacky ending of your own. (cough, cough K.C.)

5. Finally, you participate in all active social forums with book characters and repeatedly hit "chat live" with Edward and Bella on Facebook in order to speak with them in 'real time'.



If you have one or more of the above listed symptoms consult with your local bookstore and read 1-2 romance books a day. Tell 'em Dr.Smokinhotbooks said so. 

It's okay we won't tell anyone, are you a epilogue junkie?

29 comments:

Lily said...

epiloguian

I never knew there was a name for my condition. Fun post! :)

Smokinhotbooks said...

@Lily I think I saw it in the Websters dictionary...or something ;)

Carolyn Crane said...

Oh, this is great. Right, how ARE Bella and Zsadist doing anyways?

SusiSunshine said...

ROFL...
Oh yes I am and I have to go and take my meds now ;)
Great post!

Heather (DarklyReading) said...

Dr. Smokinhotbooks - I think the KMM Fever series has given me a case of "Delayed HEA gratification" - is there a treatment for that?

Patti said...

Eh-hem. #3 I actually imagine Barrons, Mac, and Christian MacKeltar happily living together a la a Laid Bare-type lifestyle.

Smokinhotbooks said...

@Carolyn Crane they just bought a farm house not too far away from the Pit. Nalla is in the first grade now. Oh god. I don't think I was supposed to go into that much detail ::cough::, I sorta kinda get carried away sometimes.

@Susi remember to take 'em morning noon and night, okay.

WickedLilPixie said...

lmfao KC has a lot of issues to work through doesn't she?

dyockman said...

KC, K-Khan try not to be too shocked here. I am not an epilogue junkie. I am able to blithely move on to the next book. Shhh! No I do NOT own The Outlandish Companion. Not at all! *whistles innocently* Okay. I am not a junkie for every book. But when one is well written I can have a smidge of a hard time letting go. :D

Smokinhotbooks said...

@Heather ::feels forehead:: It's pretty serious, if you have Delayed HEA gratification. I believe in Eastern Medicine it mentions how you should stalk KMM online forum and friend Barrons on Facebook ::closes book::

@Patti You are not alone my friend. Is it so wrong to also add me in that mix?

Larissa said...

OMG I LOVED this!!!! I am such an epilogue junkie!!! =) I totally check out the end sometimes to ensure my HEA hahahahahahahhaha LOVED IT!!!!! =))))

Smokinhotbooks said...

@WLP ::Snort:: what issues? I'm like completely normal, doesn't everyone have a New Moon poster ducked tapped on their bedroom ceiling?

@dyockman sometimes just admitting you have a problem is the first step.

PS I own the JR Ward companion and paid $15.00 for it. I don't even have buyer's remorse. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

@

Kati said...

Epilogues are a yes w/historical romances. With contemporaries, I don't need them.

Is that weird?

Smokinhotbooks said...

@Larissa I know it's wrong ::makes sign of the cross:: but yes I read the end, sometimes, okay fine, all the time. Kris N Good Books made me admit it on her Reading Taboo DIK post.

Smokinhotbooks said...

@Kati I think we would classify you as a hisepiloguian: junkie who only likes historical romance epilogues.

Fiction Vixen said...

I have none of these symptoms...none! I don't need help, now leave me alone. And if I see a camera crew following me around I'm gonna know you called A&E so just don't bother, I'm on to that scam.

Smokinhotbooks said...

@Fiction Vixen (says into mouth piece 'back off guys she's not ready for an intervention') I wouldn't do that to you. You believe me right ::puppy dog eyes::?

Kayanna Kirby said...

@Carolyn, Yea how are Bella and Zsadist doing. hehehe

I love epilogues, it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. It's like a cigarette after sex or something.

Tracy said...

LOL This is great!

Yes, I think we all are - to some extent. Well, except Kayanna. lol

I can just picture Jake and Adrien now...

Smokinhotbooks said...

@Kayanna Kirby "cigarette after sex or something" spot on girlie! I love it!

@Tracy ::shakes head:: the amount of time I spend thinking about Jake and Adrien is just not healthy O_o

elaineg0707 said...

It's good to know that I am not alone in my obsessive reach for MORE from my favorites! I seem to remember waiting for YEARS for Suzanne Brockmann's Sam and Alyssa to get their acts together, and now I get to "visit" them often in new books....YAY! Sad, really, that I am so attached to them...and her Jules and Robin, but I can't help it lol! They are real to me...*snort*...ok maybe not real, but I kinda wish they were:)

Smokinhotbooks said...

@elaineg0707 I won't go into vivid details on how obsessive I am for HEAs, character interaction etc etc, but you are not alone my friend. I often have hour long phone conversations with K-Khan (my blogger half) about books - let me tell you having both of us on AT&T, WORTH IT.

Jenre said...

Nooooooooo!!!

Give me a HEA and leave it at that.

Epilogues = boo, in my book

*runs and hides from the epiloguins*

Smokinhotbooks said...

@Jenre Gasp. Really?

PS Dr.Smokinhotbooks says you are a antiepiloguian

Sullivan McPig said...

Hmmmm.... I don't have any of the symptoms mentioned, but I do read the ending of a book in advance somtimes so I know for sure all ends as I hope it does and when it doesn't I block the ending out of my mind (makes for some traumatising re-readings sometimes as I really forget nasty endings), so does that make me a epiloguian?

Smokinhotbooks said...

@Sullivan McPig hmmm after consulting with Web MD I believe you have happyendingitis.

Renee said...

Yay epilogues! I always read posts hating on them, but I love the whole "fade in...six months (two years/ten years) later".

Yes, there must be a whole sub-set to do with imagining Adrien/Jake scenes.

Sarah said...

Cool post, made me laugh. I think it was the vision of Jake frolicking!

Sometimes I read and want a little more at the end, but more often than not the ends the end!

whateverfor said...

OMG, this is so me! I'm crushed if I don't get enough information to feel they'll actually have a happily ever after! I think I need to write a book where the HEA has ended as one character's mortal coil has snapped just to get over it already. Of course, that would crush me. (I threaten myself with these things all the time) ;)

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